I've been frustrated and downhearted about certain turns of events recently, even as recently as last week, having to do both with how we do administration (those things that enable ministry) as well as the actual ministry itself. What kind of messages do we communicate to youth & young adults? Why do we exert so much energy on spiritual arrogance? When do we let things go for a bigger reason, when do we stand up and shout "Enough!!"?
I've been reading both of Rob Bell's books, and he reminds me that the point is to engage, even if we don't understand or don't like the answers or can't figure the answer out (Velvet Elvis, "Movement 1: Jump"). Buechner is an old friend on my shelves, and I was flipping through when another statement caught my eye - that becoming disheartened is normal, but it isn't going to last, because our experience and relationship with God doesn't let despair linger (Listening to Your Life, 9/26). Instead, the deepest part of ourselves compel us to get up and struggle again, like Jacob with the angel/God.
So, behind the exhaustion and the frustration and the disappointment, I'm learning slowly to find the reason I'm in this gig to begin with. That the words and signs and experiences are just that--pointers to God, but not the real thing. "I believe; help my unbelief."
Moving On . . . - Due to some unexpected changes I've decided to leave blogger. Check out my new home: http://spiritstirrer.org/ Peace, Juan+
13 years ago